Loss and Grief

Symptoms

• Losing someone you love, a job, a relationship, having a serious accident or illness may be a difficult and painful part of life.
• You may be feeling numb, shocked and unable to resume your normal functioning.
• You may be angry and resentful that this has happened to you.
• You may be confused and in disbelief about your situation.
• You may feel guilty and blame yourself.
• You may feel sad, lonely, helpless or in despair.
• You may have a change in your sleep habits or eating habits.
• You may have unexplained physical symptoms or pain.
• You may be very tired.
• You may have disconnected from your normal activities and social circle and just want to be alone.
• You may have difficulties in working or studying.

Remedies

• These are all normal responses to a loss and are part of a natural process. However, sometimes extra help is needed to go through the process as doing it alone in too painful, or it may get stuck or de-railed by various factors.

• With some exploration of your situation, life stage, recent events and family, it is possible to start to make sense of your situation, therefore reducing its impact.
• With some therapeutic counselling, it is possible for the flow of normal emotions to resume if they were stuck.
• It is possible to start to accept all the conflicted feelings that you may be experiencing.
• It is possible to reconnect to some happy memories of your loved one.
• It is possible to learn to relax your body and mind with techniques like progressive muscle relaxation.
• Utilising mindfulness, you can learn to be an observer of your thoughts, feelings and sensations without being disturbed by them.
• Using a technique called focusing, first with the therapist and then on your own, you can learn to stay present to your body symptoms, which allows them to shift, change and bring relief.
• It is possible to use techniques like tapping, TFT, EFT with the therapist as well as on your own to soothe, calm and settle your distress.
• Utilising modalities like sand play therapy, art and expressive therapy, it is possible to express and process the intense feelings.
• Using a process like empty chair or letter writing, it may be possible to say all the things that did not get said to the lost loved one, therefore finding some closure to your loss.
• Engaging in a process like therapeutic ritual which may involve some way of saying goodbye to the lost person or thing, can bring more acceptance, closure and inner peace.